Easter Bunny Revealed

You didn't think I was just sitting around not noticing the crazy around me this whole time did you? Just because I was knee deep in tears and beers doesn't mean that the insanity that is my life stops. During this sabbatical, I discovered something magical, something wonderful, something that will put Rock Island on the map!

Vern is in fact the Easter Bunny and I have the proof. I have noticed a "trend" of hiding things for many years now, but my convincing of dad's true identity came recently during the toilet dying experiment this month. WTF? Yes, when your toilets all stop working, rather than call the plumber, you put different color dyes into the water tank and watch the swirling colors appear in the bowl to "test" the amount of water being used. But a different color in every bowl in the house? Sounds like a "test" for Easter egg dye on a mass scale. And no, it's not that smells fresh toilet bowl blue crap. It's sea green, not Clorox blue.

And then....of course, hiding my diet Pepsi, beer, cigs, and whatever he can get his hands on was the overwhelming evidence. Visual evidence speaks louder than words. BTW - that Dr. Pepper is from last Thanksgiving, see the football logo with the 23.....that is one egg that is rotten if you ask me. Or at the very least flat. Every morning I have to go looking for my good morning Diet Pepsi. Here is one in a mother f*cking boot. A boot.

The rest are hidden amongst other things, on top of a china hutch, behind some piece of crap on an abandoned closet, and behind some cobwebs hidden in the basement bar. It's like April everyday here at casa de crazy.